Cyanotype Heath Robinson contraption goat-powered torpedo

The anonymous author explained: "The torpedo is made in three sections, the head, the midship section and after body. The drawing shows the mechanism at rest. The operation is as follows: When the torpedo is fired from the tube the trigger comes in contact with a lug which causes the trigger arm to displace the cobble with falls on the Bermuda onion and crushes it. The onion gases thus released cause the goat to weep copiously. The tears are caught in the funnel on the top of the sal-ammoniac pin. These tears dissolve the sal-ammoniac pin. Thereby releasing the spring rod and prodder. This unit moves smartly forward, engaging the port quarter of the goat, thereupon the goat steps out and operates the asbestos tread mill, which is connected to the gear train that operates the propellers. A gaff and boom rig operated by the gear train, operates a spur gear which revolves rapidly on the goats back guaranteeing the continuance of the motion started by the goat prodder, the derby on the goat prevents him from catching cold while the torpedo is in the tube. It is obvious that if he should catch cold he would be rendered useless as an onion weeper. The hat also serves as a cut-off in the following manner; after a certain speed has been attained the goat has a desire to take off his hat and be comfortable, so he therefore tosses it to the rear where it falls in the gear train and jams it. Any torpedo expert will explain this to you if the above elucidation is not perfectly clear.